The real Jeff Orr, bitches about crappy design part 2

Ok, this one's been bugging me ever since some out-of-town-goober almost ran into me by turning the wrong way onto 9th st (a one way for all you non-goober out-of-towners). Whoever designed the "One Way" street sign must have been coming up on a deadline after a month long bender in some liquor soaked town without any one-way streets. Sweating the loss of his job and his sole source of booze money he drew an arrow around the words "One Way" and slammed it on his manager's desk.

"Hmm...so the arrow could just be reversed if the road is going the other way?" asked his boss.

"Ummm...I guess so...?" replies the designer, his mind thick with the congealed residue of God knows what hallucinogens.

And this is how we're left with the wussiest road sign ever conceived. Black and white and wholly unobtrusive. A sign that should be screaming, "HEY! ASSHOLE! THE CARS ON THIS ROAD ARE ALL TRAVELING THE SAME WAY! IF YOU TURN RIGHT/LEFT YOU'LL DIE IN A FIERY CAR CRASH AND YOUR FRIENDS AREN'T EVEN HERE TO FILM IT AND PUT IT ON YOUTUBE!!" Instead the sign just kind of mumbles when nobodies paying attention, "Hey, I think I heard that this is a one way road...so you might not want to...you're not listening...oh well..."

The placement of these signs is always really shitty as well. They're always placed out of the way, where nobody who's doing anything important while driving (i.e. anything other than pay attention to shitty street signs) will ever see them in the first place. This combined with its complete lack of self confidence as a sign leads me to believe that the One Way sign is the awkward kid that nobody wants to hang out with in the street sign world. They invite him to parties because they know he won't drink and can be suckered into giving everyone a ride home.

*note: The Stop sign is telling some lame Jay Leno joke and the Yield sign is laughing because he's a suck-up


So this is the part of these posts where I make some suggestions on how to improve the design. Honestly the One Way sign just needs a way to make people pay attention to it. So I'd probably just add a rockin pair of tits to the bottom.